As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another.
Proverbs 27:17, niv
As I look at this verse from the Bible, its meaning seems straightforward. Yet, as I started reading more about it, I came across several viewpoints. Let me share the main viewpoints with you.
The most commonly held one is that just like an iron file can be used to sharpen an iron tool, so we as humans can support each other and help each other grow.
Another viewpoint holds that this proverb refers to the negative aspects of human interaction. For example, one person’s anger riles another person up and escalates the situation.
Still another disagrees with the whole premise of iron being able to sharpen iron, and therefore interprets this to mean that just as two similar pieces of iron cannot sharpen each other, so two people on the same level can do nothing for each other.
Personally, I believe there’s a very important lesson to be learnt by combining these three views.
We have the ability to make each other stronger and better. How? Through our
- Encouragement
- Love
- Support
- Humor
- Honesty
- Praise
- Gentle correction
- Belief in them
and I know you can think of all the practical ways in which we build each other up with these tools we have all been blessed with.
It also holds true that since we have the ability to build each other up that we have the ability to tear each other down. We can
- Be consistently negative
- Belittle their dreams
- Ridicule them
- Ruin people’s reputations
- Choose to withhold praise, but be quick to criticize
- Sabotage their efforts
- Purposely manipulate their weaknesses
- Choose to always put ourselves above everyone else
and here too, the methods are as varied as the relationships themselves.
But let’s not forget that third viewpoint. Can you offer someone something you don’t have? Sure, you can steer them in the right direction, but what can you personally offer someone if you aren’t on your own journey to be a better, stronger person in this world? Are you stagnant? Are you ensuring your own growth? Are you regressing? Is it all about you or are you helping others along the way? There’s always someone whose current goal is to be in the very place you are moving from, the very position you have mastered and are now ready to graduate from.
This applies to all areas of life. People often get stuck in thinking about career development, but our lives are multifaceted and our growth should be too. We need to be growing in every direction to experience true balance in our lives.
Where do you want to go? Find your people who can encourage, support and guide you.
Where are you coming from? Find your people to mentor and support.
What kind of person do you want to be? Surround yourself with others who value those traits and will nurture them in you.
What kind of people do you want your children to grow up to be? Be a model for them.
We need each other.
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