If there were 50 people sitting in a room and the question was asked, “What is the most important thing to you?” the majority would answer, “My family” or “My friends”. It’s the go-to answer, the ‘you-can’t-go-wrong-with-this-one’ answer, the acceptable answer. How many of our lives, though, reflect this?
How do you choose to spend your non-working hours, and how many non-working hours do you put in at work voluntarily? What takes up the most of your time, energy, emotion? Is it really the ones you love? If you were to die before you got that position, or degree, or house, or car, would your family members and friends know that you cared about them more than that thing? How about your children? Would they be hard-pressed to summon up cherished memories of times spent playing and laughing and just being together, or would the memories be cherished simply because they were so few?
Be honest with yourself here. Lay the acceptable and expected answer aside, and admit to yourself what really drives you. Does it match up with your vision for your life? If not, you’ve got some work to do.
On the flip side, if the thing you’re spending yourself on isn’t that important to you, why are you giving it the best of you? Who is doing those ‘important to me’ things while you waste your time where you don’t belong? Just wondering. You should be wondering too.
Maybe your answer wasn’t of the cookie-cutter variety. Maybe you laid it down straight the first time around. That doesn’t mean you don’t have to take a look inside. Why is that thing so much more important than people to you? Will it support and encourage you when you need it? Will your job share your joys and sorrows with you? Will your car take care of you when you are sick? Short of a Transformer situation, I doubt it. Confront whatever situations had you lose your faith in people, or the circumstances that made you vow to accumulate wealth and status at any cost. Don’t let them control you. You were made to appreciate and be appreciated, love and be loved. Really, you can’t live fully without it… and yes, you guessed it – that requires relationships.